Sunday, August 25, 2013

#8Sunday #SundaySnippets: A world of pain


I'm still working on part 3 of Anton and Lenora, All Things Returned.  In this week's snippet, poor Lenora is in a bad way.



I managed as far as the end of Edward’s street. I could see the Norris house two doors down and I increased my stride, thinking myself close to my goal. A pain ripped through me, so strong it robbed me for a moment of my breath. It was followed by another and another, hard knots of pain coming in waves. I bent double as though to shelter my unborn child from these blows. I feared it more than the pain in my limbs, for I knew it for what it was.
 “No,” I whispered as though the force of my will could stop what happened. My body ignored my pleas and the pains kept on. 

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More Anton and Lenora
Book One--Sweet Lenora is currently available
Book Two--To the Wind is slated for release in October.
More about the series HERE 



19 comments:

  1. Oh no...I hope she's far enough along...this makes me sad.

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    1. Yeah, not a good moment for poor Lenora. Thanks for stopping by Millie.

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  2. Oh my, shes going into labor. This could be very bad if she doesn't get somewhere quick!

    Couple of typos though (in case you want to correct). I think the word "see" is missing from second sentence "I could ___ the Norris house two doors down..."

    "I bent double as though I shelter my unborn child from these blows." sheltered, yes?

    My eye skims stuff all the time in my own writing. :)

    Intense scene though. I'm scared for her!

    History Sleuth's Milk Carton Murders

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    1. Yikes! Thanks Cindy. It's true about skimming--luckily it's a WIP and there's still lots of time to fix things.

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  3. Very tense scene, leaves me hoping everything will be ok somehow. Excellent excerpt!

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  4. How terrifying! Childbirth is dangerous in any era, and this setting does not bode well for her baby!

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  5. About three sentences in, I started doing some long-forgotten Lamaze breathing . . . very intense scene!

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  6. Thanks Sarah. I seem to remember that too...panting, wasn't there a whole lot of panting?

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  7. How terrible to have her child in this setting. I fear for her child and for her. This isn't safe.

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  8. Nice analogy with her seeking to shield the baby from the pain.
    Great 8!

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  9. Oh, that's terrible, she needs to arrive quickly. Isn't anyone looking for her?

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  10. Great description. And so close to her goal...

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  11. Interesting snippet. Can't wait to see if she gets to her goal.

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  12. Yeah, you definitely convey a great sense of dread and fear. Thanks for sharing!

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