I'm channeling Stuart Smalley today. You remember Stuart, the Al Franken character from Saturday Night Live who sat in front of the mirror and did affirmations?
My mirror image is tired of me. "I'm a writer," I tell her. "I'm a good writer. I'm funny. I can be profound. And darn it all, readers love me."
"Yeah, yeah, yeah," she says. "You're a writer. Yada, yada, yada. Stop staring at me and go write something already."
"Write something? Like, now?"
"Why not now?"
"Well...I'm not being visited by the muse."
"Not the muse thing again. What happened to 'just do it'?"
"I don't know if I can. I mean, have you seen what I've written lately? It looks like somebody threw up on it. It makes no sense. The sentences don't go together. The spelling, well we all know I can't spell. It's dull as yesterday's socks. And the words, when I read them out loud they sound like the drill at the dentist's office. It'll never match up to the last book. Now, that was a good book. This..."
My mirror image sighs. She's got better things to do. She could be flossing her teeth. Or examining the tiny mole at her hairline. What is that thing anyway? Should we have it looked into?
I walk away. She's right. I should write already.
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